Here
by jmr27
Summary: Tag to episode 13x21. Sam's point of view. How did he wind up here? I know there are a bunch of these up already, but this idea wasn't going to let me go.


**I know, everyone is writing a tag to 13X21. Such wonderful material! I just couldn't let it be. There have been a lot of bits from Dean's point of view. Here's one from Sam's.**

* * *

 **HERE**

 _We're here_. The thought sang through Sam's entire body as his boots hit the ground. Then he staggered, stumbled, tumbled into the dirt. But he didn't care. He picked himself back up and looked at the gash of light that had ripped a hole between worlds. The magic that had brought them here.

They had once thought that this place would be their salvation. They had thought they could trap Lucifer on the other side and be free of him forever. Instead, this place had become their curse. Yet as Sam looked around, he felt a smile come to his face.

 _They're here_. Not here, in this forest. Here, there was no one in sight but his brother and the two angels. But they were _here_. Mom. Jack. Somewhere, not too far, they were alive. Surviving. Hoping.

Had they lost hope yet? It was hard to imagine such a thing in this place.

Yet from the moment Sam's boots touched the ground, hope was all he felt. It was as if a weight had been lifted. A weight he hadn't realized he had been carrying.

Sam glanced at the rift one last time before they marched out in the direction they hoped would lead to their family.

 _Lucifer isn't here_. The abomination that called himself an angel was stuck on the other side. Trapped in a spell he could not escape. Over a year, he had roamed free. Over a year, he had haunted Sam's dreams. Over a year, that small fear had persisted in the back of his head.

 _What if he finds me_?

For the first time in over a year, Sam was free of fear. Here, there was no devil. Here, Lucifer had been beaten. Not trapped and shoved in a cage, but well and truly killed, never to return. Here was proof that it was possible.

 _We're here_.

o0o

 _We shouldn't have come here_. Sam knew it as soon as he heard them, as soon as he saw the hoard of vampires that moved out of the shadows. Their faces were pale and deformed, their eyes burning with hunger. Somehow when they were starving, they were stronger. Sam knew before they reached him, before he raised his fists to fight.

 _There are too many_.

He had been too eager. Giddy at the rush of power that had come with trapping the devil, he thought he could do anything. Bouyed by the knowledge that his family was close, he hadn't wanted to waste a moment. They had taken down vampire nests before.

Never like this, though.

The attack was savage, every movement targeted to kill. The well-fed vampires back home enjoyed a fight, they liked to play with their food a bit. Watching the fear in the victim's eyes was half the fun of feeding. But here, there was no room for fun. There was no time to play. These vampires wanted food, and they would have it.

Sam lashed out. Ducked, dodged, chopped with all his strength. Keep them away from the others. The angels needed to clear the way. Someone needed to get to Mom and Jack. Get them home.

They deserved better than to be trapped _here_.

Clawed hands grabbed his arm and twisted at the machete. Sam strained to break the grip, but another set of hands landed on his shoulder.

"Dean!" Sam called to his brother, as he alwayas had when he was in trouble.

But Dean was busy, fighting for his own life. He couldn't come. He shouldn't come. If Dean came, they were both dead. Sam could see them in the tunnel behind him. More vampires, a line of hungry mouths just waiting.

Words he had spoken a week ago replayed in his mind. If _we die, we die together_.

 _I didn't mean it_. He gasped for air, but there was nothing left in his lungs.

Teeth cut his skin and Sam screamed. He could see the blood, spurting like a fountain from his neck. He could see his flesh dangling from the vampire's lips. He felt the warm tingle as his limbs lost circulation. Death was close. Death was inevitable.

Miracles had happened before. Was death really the end? It was _here_. This was not a land of miracles. This was a land where death had won.

"Dean-!" But the final words wouldn't come. He didn't have any strength left. It was sucked out of him by a desperate mouth that dragged him away into darkness.

 _Dean, please_. Sam's last thoughts were one desperate plea as cold overtook his body. _Get out of here._

o0o

 _He's not here_.

The emptiness in Dean's chest was only matched by the emptiness at his side. The space where his brother should have stood.

 _Not here_.

Dean looked around at the forest, the colors somehow sucked from this world as if the Apocalypse had drained the life from the very earth. This world was in its death throes.

 _Not here_.

Sam should have died in bed at the age of ninety, or even a hundred. He should have been surrounded by books and friends and ready to pass in peace.

 _Not here_.

If he had to die bloody, Dean should have gone with him. Side by side. Other hunters would hear of their deaths and come build their fire. Here, no one would come. Here, no one would care.

 _Not here_.

They came to the edge of the camp and Dean finally saw his mother again. She strode toward him, surprised written across her face. He should have smiled. Should have hugged her. But he knew the question that was coming and he couldn't yet speak the answer.

"Where's Sam?

 _Not here_.

o0o

 _Who's here_?

Sam's breath came back in a sharp gasp, his own lungs startled that they were working again. The cold fled from his limbs, and he pushed himself forward to sit up. His hand slapped his neck; no blood, no wound. Sam looked up at the squeaking fan and the small shaft of sunlight above. No face hovered nearby, waiting to see if he was alright. Sam hauled himself to his feet. No hand emerged from the darkness to steady him.

 _Who's here_?

He could not be alone. Someone had brought him back. Someone else was here. Sam turned and the light at his neck caught on a fiigure hunkered near the ground. He stepped closer only to jump back again at the sight. The sight that nearly stopped his heart again.

 _Where am I_? For an awful moment the world lurched and Sam was back in a cage where the only sight for a thousand years had been that face.

The fan squeaked overhead. Pale light filtered from the sky. No. Not the cage. Not there. Never again would he go there.

That didn't seem to matter. The devil was _here_.

The familiar feeling washed over Sam in a wave. The memory of a thousand years of pain filled his skin in a moment. Then he was numb, with room only for one thing: fear.

Not again. Sam struggled to breath as he stared at the smug face. He was alone with the devil and hellish deal to make.

Why did they always wind up _here_?

o0o

 _He's here_.

Sam couldn't see him, but he could not shake the sense of that presence behind him. The crunch of leaves under his boots. The hint of a shadow out of the corner of his eye. Following. Watching.

He remembered how he had once clung to a scar on his hand to make that feeling go away. To remind himself that it wasn't real. He was out. He was free.

But he could never be free. Not as long as the devil was here. He would have thrown himself to the mercy of the vampire horde, if only to avoid this. If only to know he would never see Lucifer's face again.

 _One way or another_. That was what the devil had said. It didn't matter what Sam chose, Lucifer would find Jack. He would find everyone that Sam cared about, and who knew what would happen then.

Sam couldn't consign himself to oblivion. He couldn't take the easy way out. He couldn't leave Dean to face the devil alone. So he agreed. He walked out of the tunnel and held onto one thought.

 _When Lucifer finds my family, I'll be there_.

o0o

All activity in the camp stopped when they arrived. Everyone looked up to stare at the walking dead man with the devil on his shoulder. _Maybe I should have stopped to wash off the blood_. But it was too late now. All Sam had wanted to do was move. Move as fast as he could.

He didn't want to be alone with the devil.

When they entered the camp, the nausea in his stomach finally settled. When he saw his family, the chill that had followed him on the long trek faded.

 _We're here_. We're _all_ here. Mom, Jack, Dean, Castiel. Everyone was safe. Everyone was alright.

For a moment, Sam breathed a sigh of relief. Until he saw the shattered look on Dean's face, saw the tilt of his brother's head when he realized who else was here.

Sam thought again of the vampire's cold hands holding him down, of the searing pain and the heavy feeling of loss as his throat was ripped out. He could endure that again. Maybe he should have, to avoid this. He had brought this terrible, twisted, sickening thing to them. They would think he had given up Jack to save his own skin.

But saving his own life had never crossed Sam's mind. He was here to save Dean. To keep his promise. _We die together_.

Sam knew that his brother would have come back for him. Would have thrown himself on a horde of vampires just to give Sam a proper burial. If that didn't kill him, Dean would have chased danger until he found something that would bring him face to face with a reaper. Either that, or the suicide needle he now carried in his bag. The day Dean had gone to talk to Death without a second thought was the day Sam had known. The look on Dean's face when he saw Sam again only confirmed it.

 _We die together_. It was the only way.

And we won't die here. That was the bargain Sam had made. His brother would not lose him here.

Here, where the colors were washed out and the sunlight felt faded and wan. Here, where the angels had won and brought hell to earth.

Here. It would all end here.

Sam had lived with the fear for over a year. He had seen the trail of bloodshed and chaos that the devil always left in his wake. He had been used and abused and now he was done.

Sam glanced over his shoulder as Lucifer strode smugly into camp and introduced himself to Jack. It made him sick to think what he had done. Who he had brought here. That he had let himself be used again. But not for nothing. When he left that tunnel, Sam made a vow. When he said 'yes,' Sam knew it would be for the last time. One way or another, Sam Winchester would never be used by the devil again.

They had an archangel on their side. They had an archangel's blade. Lucifer had been killed here once. He could be killed again. He had made a promise to Lucifer back at the bunker, when the devil had been on his knees, his grace pouring into a bowl.

 _When we're done, we kill you_.

Sam was not going back home until he saw it done or died trying. Sam would not live in the same world as the devil again. He would make himself free, he would die side by side with his brother, fighting.

One way or another, _it ends here_.

* * *

 **So, did anyone else think that this episode felt a bit like "The Fellowship of the Ring?" I mean: Choose one of two routes. Tunnels full of monsters or the longer, safer way. We go through the tunnels. Someone dies. But now they're back. Was I the only person who thought of the Mines of Moria?**

 **Anyway, hope you liked my tag. Please post a review!**


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